The bullshit thread

[brehme1989]

you americans should try to be united: just americans, not white americans, hispanic americans, asian americans, etc.

the color of the skin should count as much as the color of the eyes.

That. And they also need a chill pill.

 

[brehme1989]

Hope anyone living in Beirut is alright.

Even felt that shit here, 250km away....

 

[Javier'sSon]

That was insane, hope Nerazzurri's Hoe and who he knows are fine.

 

[Candreva Crosses]

Is there any news yet about what caused it?

 

[brehme1989]

Is there any news yet about what caused it?

Speculation all over. They hid weapons and bombs in there apparently so some suggest it was an attack. The "official" story is that it was an accident. Lebanon is a mess for months now so it's possible that they simply fucked up.

 

[Pimpin]

i saw it on twitter immediately, I thought it was like a nuke at first. God willing the number of victims does not grow further.

- - - Updated - - -

i saw it on twitter immediately, I thought it was like a nuke at first. God willing the number of victims does not grow further.

 

[brehme1989]

This was roughly a kiloton explosion. In a metropolitan city, albeit in its less densely populated port side. Hopefully the casualty number doesn't go to the expected levels.

 

[K.I.]

RIP to the Victims, looked terrible.

 

[phonk]

So here’s what happened: Now that the university has been closed for what feels like an eternity and I was only able to pick up one number last semester (which essentially lasted for only one week) and I’m also low on curren€y right now, there has been an uncomfortable lack of sexual intercourse recently.
In the previous week I decided to hop back on Tinder, which I’ve neglected for a while. Swiped until I ran out of likes for the day and was happy with the results. Mostly meh matches but a couple of good ones, I was happy with the harvest.
Cracked my knuckles and wrote „Hey, what’s up“, copy pasted it and sent it to the chicks. This is by far the most effective icebreaker to send, that creative shit don’t get you anywhere.
Most replied the same day and things were going pretty well, especially with one girl in particular. In terms of looks she was better than all the others and so I decided to only proceed texting with her, don’t have the patience for the other chicks. Pretty face bright green eyes, nose ring, couple of silly tattoos and a little flat (I’m defo a tits guy), but you take what you can get, right?
We exchanged numbers and I asked her if she wanted to go for a fucking ice cream, to which she agreed to.
The first date went pretty well, used a good chunk of my arsenal when it comes to charming patters, which I’ve utilized countless times before, mere routine for me. Not insanely eventful tbh, but definitely got the notion that my efforts will lead to frutation sooner or later (but rather sooner).

Anyway, we kept the contact, both sides dropping hints here and there. At this point I started to think this is getting a bit fishy, as she took the initiative a little too much.
Grabbed some rubbers (just to make sure) and met her today again to brunch in a vegan einstein local in the most, let’s call it „hip“, district, in the city.
Asked her subtly in which part of the city she lived. I knew she’s a former florist and is currently unemployed, so it kinda took me by surprise when she told me she lived close by, because the flats in that district are hella expensive to rent. Fancy shit you know what I’m saying? Really nice neighborhood, fairly central, lots of restaurants, very clean. Anyway, back to the point: This was the moment where I just went for it and invited myself to her place. Suggested we’d blast a joint and talk about space and those shenanigans which I’m really into. She gladly accepted my kind offer and we strolled to hers in Joao Mario sprint speed.

Now this is were things started to get weird. She unlocked the door and and we entered the flat and I have to mention that I’ve seen some filthy apartments but this place was downright nasty. The floor was covered in all sorts of stuff and it was impossible to move around without stepping at multiple things at once, on top of that there was a layer of cat shit (3 cats in the apartment). On the ceiling was a massive ant road starting from the living room window all the way to the kitchen. Very diverse fauna I have to admit, there were also plenty of bedbugs and flies, lice most likely too. That place is infested. Another thing which was hard to miss was a lack of doors in this dump. The only two doors were the front door and also the door to the toilet. Bedroom door? Negative. Shower door? Nope. Nothing. The walls were in no better condition, it was hard to see the plaster underneath some hilariously ugly graffiti.
When I entered the apartment it became abundantly clear we were not gonna be alone, cause I heard retarded sounding voices from the living room. She took my hand and introduced me to her room mates, a very unordinary group of people. One guy looked like he hadn’t seen a barber since his teen years and had a flokati over his chest, all the way down to the top of his LSD inspired baggy pants. Then there was a person which I identified as a female but she claimed to be gender fluid. Just a very odd looking creature… a little chunky, 5mm long hair, round glasses, a nose ring and and mosquito bites underneath her tank top, with no bra obviously. Then there was another guy who I wasn’t able to communicate with, as he laid motionless on a table (looked dead to me but whatever). This is where things made sense now and I realized I’ve ran into a fucking hippie commune.
At this point I just wanted to get it over with asap and leave, but then my Tinder date reminded me of the joint which we wanted to smoke and her friends were pressuring me (in a kind way though), so I couldn’t refuse. We passed the J around and the chick leaves to take a piss and the hairy dude starts talking about how everybody in this commune bangs everybody else, sometimes at the same time and I’m already the 4th guy she took home this month. No prejudice here at all, those free spirited people have their lifestyle you know, and I won’t judge her either, she’s free to fulfill her sexual needs I guess. But I have to add that this is not really my thing.

She came back and I asked her if she’s ready and she grabbed my arm and led me to the „bedroom“, which in all honesty was more like the „loveroom“ where the hippie orgies take place. There were some Buddha statues and scented candles and all that shit. The bed sheet didn’t look exactly sterile to me, it was about as hygienic as a used piece of toilet paper. Those peeps must have not changed it since they bought it.
We undressed and started having some „fun“ (fun with quotation marks, as I could hear those other 2 from the living room being loud due to the lack of doors and I don’t find that relaxing), but not for long. We wanted to change position and when she got off top of me I saw my dick and my nuts where covered in blood. Apparently she was still on her period which she thought was over the day before. I was still determined to blow my load though, so she gave me a BJ and we got it over with.
I got dressed, didn’t thank anybody for hospitality and took the fuck off.

I guess the moral of the story is to just take chicks to my place from now on.

 

[Adriano]

that was a wild rollercoaster

you wouldve been better off just jacking off and taking a nap after lol

 

[Candreva Crosses]

phonk I admire your strength to finish whatever you started. I hope this is applied to your university studies too

 

[Fapuccino]

That's Unpossible's burner acc

 

[wera]

Phonk, I know exactly what you mean. I always thought of myself as the living example of the motto beggars can't be choosers, so I've been through the pretty chicks, the not so pretty chicks, the telechubbies, the miss Anorexia type, but there is just something about the hippie chicks that rubbed me the wrong way and even tho some are def cute, it seems they always live in strange environments and have some deep issues that need resolving.

Thanks for taking one for the team.

 

[Harpsabu]

I hope you didn't rawdog that hippie phonk. Great story all the same. Go home and wash in a bath of acid though,place sounds dirty as fuck.

 

[Javier'sSon]

Thanks for taking one for the team.

And keep a 2M distance please. Yes, for "covid".

 

[phonk]

Oof, has anybody seen Joe Rogans new studio? This will take a while to get used to, at first glance I don't like it one bit.

Yeah, it's really bad.

 

[Fapuccino]

Oof, has anybody seen Joe Rogans new studio? This will take a while to get used to, at first glance I don't like it one bit.

Yeah, it's really bad.

He took "disappearing up one's own ass" literally.

 

[phonk]

The sad thing is that there’s very little room for improvement (no pun intended).
Due to the weird tunnel shape there’s a very limited amount of space and as a viewer you can see it’s far too small, maybe quarter the size of the previous studio.
Don’t get me started on the fucking background. The red color is incredibly unpleasant to look at, it completely destroys the chill atmosphere and the sound panels are kinda distracting too.
I liked it when Rogan had the brick wall with the Jimi Hendrix and Elvis mugshots or the american flag in the background and the guest had the curtain behind him.
In addition to that you had the table with all those cool little gimmicks on it. The new studio offers absolutely no diversity, it all looks the same, which means it all looks like shit. No charm, no soul, nothing.

There are also issues with the camera set up, the lighting and the audio, but I’m sure all of that will be fixed within the next few episodes.
If it was up to me I’d tear everything down and start from scratch but that won’t happen. There may be some minor adjustments, but the room has a low ceiling (again no pun intended) potentialwise.

 

[Adriano]

his podcast is kinda overrated, he pretty much repeats conversations with every guest now

 

[Candreva Crosses]

his podcast is kidna overrated, he pretty much repeats conversations with every guest now

Haven't laughed this hard since Pioli was our manager and people here thought K-dog and Gagli were actually good